Saturday, December 31, 2005
A Pet for Jinxie
Dear Pal,
I know you lust after Athena, and she surely is a gorgeous kitty - quite suitable for your handsome self. However, I must tell you that I am quite a beauty too. My mommy shows me your pictures all the time, and I can't help but purr when I see your handsome body shots. I have included some pictures of my own for your viewing pleasure. The human in the picture is quite nice, unlike your Mommy (and mine, I might add). Mommy makes me wear a bell so she knows when I plan on jumping out and cutting Daddy's legs. She has recently begun to make a fire for me to lay in front of, which is pretty nice, however it does bug me when she coos over my warm belly fur and wants to disrupt my slumber to pet me.
I too can't wait until my Mommy returns to school, but it is my understanding that she is getting a dog to keep me company very soon. Yes, you heard me right, a DIRTY DOG! She keeps talking about how she can't wait to dress him up (because she knows if she tries that with me, she'll be breaking out the band-aids). I will have to cut him to let him know who's boss in this family. If you have any advice to help with this transition, I would appreciate it.
Happy New Year,Jinxie (Vale Queen's kitty)
Dear Jinxie,
First, let me thank you for the photos. You are an alluring beauty. I am a taken man, but I might have a friend for you. He's still a bit young, but he's very handsome. His name is mouse. He's a badass pirate kind of guy....
As for this dog - WHAT IS WRONG WITH MOMMIES? Why do they think their behavior is okay? The bell situation shows that you have your mommy in line, for the most part. They only accessorize you because they fear you. They need a warning to prepare for your attacks. That's good. They know who is boss (and it certainly isn't them).
You immediately have to train this dog. With proper training, he may make a suitable pet for you. Jinxie's obedience school for dumb dogs should operate smoothly with your keen senses.
I believe that this dog can become very useful in your fight against your mommy. If she is busy dressing this dog for the winter, she won't be bothering you while you are resting in front of the fire.
If she has to walk this beast, she won't be in the house listening for your bell, so you can plan your attack strategies with ease.
If the dog is tall, it might also serve as an easy to ladder to help you get to high places. For dive bomb attacks, of course.
Upon his arrival, if he shows any resistance to your plans, I suggest you cut him too. Show him that you are the one to be obeyed.
Best, Pal
I know you lust after Athena, and she surely is a gorgeous kitty - quite suitable for your handsome self. However, I must tell you that I am quite a beauty too. My mommy shows me your pictures all the time, and I can't help but purr when I see your handsome body shots. I have included some pictures of my own for your viewing pleasure. The human in the picture is quite nice, unlike your Mommy (and mine, I might add). Mommy makes me wear a bell so she knows when I plan on jumping out and cutting Daddy's legs. She has recently begun to make a fire for me to lay in front of, which is pretty nice, however it does bug me when she coos over my warm belly fur and wants to disrupt my slumber to pet me.
I too can't wait until my Mommy returns to school, but it is my understanding that she is getting a dog to keep me company very soon. Yes, you heard me right, a DIRTY DOG! She keeps talking about how she can't wait to dress him up (because she knows if she tries that with me, she'll be breaking out the band-aids). I will have to cut him to let him know who's boss in this family. If you have any advice to help with this transition, I would appreciate it.
Happy New Year,Jinxie (Vale Queen's kitty)
Dear Jinxie,
First, let me thank you for the photos. You are an alluring beauty. I am a taken man, but I might have a friend for you. He's still a bit young, but he's very handsome. His name is mouse. He's a badass pirate kind of guy....
As for this dog - WHAT IS WRONG WITH MOMMIES? Why do they think their behavior is okay? The bell situation shows that you have your mommy in line, for the most part. They only accessorize you because they fear you. They need a warning to prepare for your attacks. That's good. They know who is boss (and it certainly isn't them).
You immediately have to train this dog. With proper training, he may make a suitable pet for you. Jinxie's obedience school for dumb dogs should operate smoothly with your keen senses.
I believe that this dog can become very useful in your fight against your mommy. If she is busy dressing this dog for the winter, she won't be bothering you while you are resting in front of the fire.
If she has to walk this beast, she won't be in the house listening for your bell, so you can plan your attack strategies with ease.
If the dog is tall, it might also serve as an easy to ladder to help you get to high places. For dive bomb attacks, of course.
Upon his arrival, if he shows any resistance to your plans, I suggest you cut him too. Show him that you are the one to be obeyed.
Best, Pal
